How to Support a Friend Who is Unexpectedly Pregnant

It’s one of the hardest things to say out loud, especially if you aren’t in a situation to consider raising...

It’s one of the hardest things to say out loud, especially if you aren’t in a situation to consider raising a child. “I think I might be pregnant.”

If one of your friends confides in you that she might be pregnant, it means she trusts you.

But now what?? How do you help?    

LISTEN. ASK SOME GOOD QUESTIONS   

Stop: Be quiet. Pause. Resist the urge to think about what you’re going to say next.

Look: Make eye contact with your friend. Don’t multi-task; focus on her and what she is saying.

Listen: Listen with an open mind, not for what you want to hear or think you might hear next. (If you’re someone who finishes other’s sentences, or sometimes interrupts, those are two clues that you’re not listening.) Ask questions to ensure you understand.

Ask:  Have you told anyone else? How are you feeling? What’s going through your head right now?  What pregnancy symptoms do you have? Have you taken a pregnancy test?

HELP HER FIND ACCURATE INFORMATION

There is a lot of information on pregnancy and pregnancy options online. But is it medically accurate? It is important to make sure the information your friend is finding is credible and based on facts, not manipulating her to make one choice or another, but truly benefiting her. Our medical director makes sure that all of the information our staff provides is up-to-date and accurate. We would love to help your friend find the answers to her questions.

It will be helpful for her to know what pregnancy symptoms are normal and what could be signs that something is wrong. In the first trimester of pregnancy, about 20 percent end in miscarriage. Ask how she will know if her pregnancy is viable.

If she is considering abortion, what kind of procedure? Does she have the latest information on the abortion pill and surgical abortion procedures? What are the risks? It will help her to know exactly how far along she is in her pregnancy so she knows what procedures are even available to her.

Other things to ask/things she should consider: If she is going to continue the pregnancy, what does she need to do right now to ensure a healthy pregnancy? How is she supposed to find a doctor? What about insurance (or lack of insurance)? We have professional staff who can connect your friend to resources that will help her throughout her pregnancy and will prepare her for parenting. Just knowing she is not alone will put her mind at ease.

WE CAN HELP

Encourage your friend to take a deep breath. Assure her you will be there to help her sort it all out.

Often young women choose to come to us for information and support before making a final decision. We can verify the pregnancy test. Then we perform an ultrasound (in most cases). We can tell if the pregnancy is developing in the right place in her uterus and look for signs that indicate a viable pregnancy.

We don’t shame anyone or pressure them to make a certain choice. We are here to help you (and your friend) get the information needed to make an informed decision.

Call or text us today to make an appointment. We’re here to help.

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